The Essential Oil Bandwagon

So some of you may think I'm completely nuts, hippie-ish, voodoo, whatever. BUT I thought I would quickly share with you something that has benefitted my family over the last several months.

When Rowland had his stomach issues a few months ago, we were desperate to try anything. A friend and coworker of Josh's told us about some essential oils and gave us some samples to try. No harm no foul so we figured we would give it a shot. I really thought that it was crazy but was willing to try anything. After using a digestive blend on Rowland's stomach twice a day, he began to use the bathroom regularly. I would notice that when I stopped giving it to him, he stopped going to the bathroom. Now, he is back to normal! I really thought that it was crazy but if it works, it works right? They had also given us a sample of lavender, so we would put it on the boys' feet at night and we were noticing that they were sleeping a lot better. At times Rowland would calm down almost immediately after applying lavender to his feet.

We decided to give the oils a shot and signed on with a company to have a wholesale account. I was not interested and still am not interested in selling any oils, but they were working so why not try some more? Since getting started with the oils, we have had success using them for headaches, bug bites, stomach issues, nausea, sleeping, sore muscles, allergies and asthma, etc. I realize that it sounds crazy, but I also understand that it is all natural, safe for my children, and seems to be working pretty well for us! If you have been wanting to try essential oils, some medicines don't work for you, or you want a healthy alternative for your children and yourself, let me know. Like I said before, I do not sell the oils. Because we were given the opportunity to try the oils before signing up for the wholesale account, I'd love to give anyone interested the same opportunity. If you would like to try something at wholesale price, have a question about an oil for a specific problem, or just want to know more, just let me know and I'd be happy to answer your questions! Not all oils work the same for every person so what works for us may not work for you and vice versa. But if they can help someone else the way that they have helped us, I'd be happy to share them with you!

A Child's Perspective

I've really been debating writing a blog about this topic for a while. Recently, however, it has been weighing on my heart tremendously and it's something that I feel so passionately about. I promise to try to make this as brief as possible. I will warn you, however, that the words I'm about to say may step on some toes. I say them out of love and concern and with no ill intentions, and I speak them from a place of experience, hurt and healing. 

"That word" is not used in a joking manner in my home. "That word" is not used as a threat in an argument. "That word" is something that changed my life. 

"That word"? Divorce. 

Too often in today's society marriage is looked at simply as a loosely binding, only if I get my way and I'm happy, tax credit, as long as _____, agreement. Wow. My heart literally ACHES. 

Over the last few years, I have witnessed and experienced divorce in many couples, including my own parents. I was of the "not my parents, never happen to me" mentality until it hit me like a ton of bricks in 2008. My family is/was a fantastic Christian family who worked hard to provide the best life for me and my brothers that they could. The years that have followed have been filled with heartache, tears, healing and new relationships. 

Let me make something VERY clear. While I do NOT condone divorce in many, many cases, I do believe that the Bible gives reasons for divorce. This post does NOT simply refer to my parents divorce. I am also NOT here to judge my parents, you, or anyone else with the decisions you make. 

The reason for this blog post then?

I am extremely tired of the "I just don't want to be married" "We just don't love each other" "He/She just doesn't understand" and many times, the marriage is ended, with no real try for reconciliation and the children are left....in the middle...shuffled from home to home. That's right, your children. 

My reason for this post is to give light to a different side. A child's perspective.

If you think for one second that your divorce will not negatively affect your children in one way or the other, satan has you so very fooled. (And let me be clear that I am speaking on cases of selfishness, not abuse) 

Your children will pay the price regardless of their age. You can get rid of your spouse. They can not get rid of their parent. More than likely, they will watch their world, as they know it, crumble. They will feel lost and shuffled between two sides. Even if it is not asked or mentioned, they may feel pulled to one side or the other. When you divorce, realize that your decision will not only affect your relationship with your spouse but it also affects your relationship with your children. Please don't be fooled. Sure, some couples can divorce and be the "happy, shared custody, live next door" families that are portrayed on tv. But more than likely, it won't be yours, as it isn't in the majority of divorce cases. Your children may feel as though they are to blame. They will, more than likely, not tell you every thing they feel no matter how "close" you think your relationship is. Their relationship with God may also be affected. Either positively or negatively, and you can only hope that it is not the latter. This is not a blog post about whether divorce is right or wrong. (That's a discussion for another day) I am simply imploring you -society- to step back and realize that it isn't as "black and white" as you think. 

Marriage is to be a blessed union between two people. Marriage should not be a selfish agreement. It is hard work. It isn't to be taken lightly. It's sacred. And when you chose to get married, you felt that way. You took that vow. Why then, do we not fight for it? Why then, do we let satan rip it away from us without holding on as tight as possible? 

All I am simply asking is to seriously consider your children, your actions and your reasons. Your relationships with your children will not be the same. It isn't just about you and your spouse when you bring children in to the world. If you do divorce your spouse, hug your children. Love them. Get them someone, BESIDES yourself or family, to talk to. DO NOT trash talk your ex. DO NOT make them choose a side. Above all, consider that they may be hurting or struggling with the concept and don't downplay their feelings.

"This hurts me so much more than my children" Is something that I heard a few years back and my heart broke. In many cases, that is so naive. It hurts. It is a different hurt, but it hurts. 

I have struggled with the consequences of my parents divorce and have experienced many of the feelings mentioned above. I have also gotten to a place of healing with some and not with others. I have overcome many of the challenges that I mentioned. This post is not about me or my experiences, however, it is about children in general. They have a voice too and I emplore you to listen to it. Not to keep your marriage alive for them but to understand that they also play a role in a divorce. Don't be naive and fooled in to thinking otherwise.

The struggles of a sweet boy

I realize that it has been a while since I have "blogged." Shame on me. I also realize that I am a mommy, wife, teacher, crafter, grocery shopper, house cleaner, clothes washer, etc, and these days I do well to remember the date and get everyone clothed :)

I wanted to write this post to give an update about our little family. Let me say thank you, first, for the calls, texts, messages, and sweet prayers for answers and of encouragement. The last few weeks, for me, have been physically and emotionally draining. I'm not saying that for any sympathy. It's just a fact, so please take it as just that. It is what it is. However, over the past few weeks, I have been overwhelmed with the reminder of what a blessing our family and friends are. 

I was, by no means, naive enough to think that baby #2 would be a walk in the park. We'd done this before though, so sleepless nights, poop, and screams were all expected and prepared for. Again, we'd done this before...right? Ha! While everyone has struggles with the first, I have come to believe that you have struggles with them all. Just different struggles. 

Rowland and I slept on the couch for 2 1/2 weeks after coming home. He cried A LOT. But that's normal right? Keep reading---

I was exhausted. I missed my bed drastically. I missed sleep. And whoever says "Sleep when they sleep," it didn't work with #2 because, ahem, I have a #1, duh! I cried, like a lot. I missed playing with Carter. I missed my husband. I spent my days feeding, caring for both children, and if I was lucky, I got a shower. By the time our 2nd week checkup came around, projectile vomit was a daily thing. At two weeks, Rowland had gained a pound and a half. Apparently that was a lot to my pediatrician and he was nursing every hour and a half. Again, too often for her. I wasn't quite sure how I was going to calm my screaming and vomiting child. She figured he had some reflux, prescribed Zantac and sent us on our way with strict instructions to slow up on the nursing. 

Over the next few weeks, and more weight gain, our medicine was changed to Prilosec. I felt ridiculous pumping medicines in my child at one month old. At one point, he was getting gas drops, a probiotic, Prilosec, Zantac, gripe water, thrust medication and vitamin d drops. I was done. No more. The vomiting continued, the screaming never stopped. I continued the Prilosec and vitamin and stopped everything else. After 3 days of projectile vomit after EVERY SINGLE feeding, I called the pediatrician again and begged them to do something. When I say projectile, I mean forceful, across the room, everyone has to change and the carpet had to be cleaned. I knew babies cried, but he was NEVER happy, was always arching and screaming, and I didn't feel like I could enjoy him. So we were referred to a GI specialist. 

We have since had an ultrasound (that took an hour longer than it should have because of a huge gas ball), and an upper GI. Both came back normal, but we were informed that Rowland has severe reflux. "He refluxes without any triggers or effort and its a significant amount" (Duh, I thought to myself) That combined with lots of gas and only pooping once a week has made for an unhappy baby. We have since tried some essential oils and figured out the medicine dosage and we have actually slept for the last 4 nights (4hour stretches) and have had little to no projectile vomit :) Exciting right? 

We go back to see the GI doctor next week but for now, we are starting to enjoy our little one and I think he's beginning to enjoy us a little too :)

We are SO BLESSED with families who are willing to watch Carter, bring dinner, or even just go to doctors visits with me. Special thanks to our sweet friends who have prayed and encouraged me over the last few weeks. I want to name a few by name because I need you to know that just listening and talking has made a HUGE difference: Cecilia Hatley, Kathy Blackwell, Wynne Callis You all have been so sweet and encouraging!

We also have crazy friends who come to help do random house projects AND bring dinner: Bean and Reece family, you are crazy but we are so thankful for you all!!

So I wrote this to inform all of our sweet friends and family of our recent "adventures" and of the results and progress we've made. I am so blessed with two sweet boys and would never, for one second, change anything. God uses situations to teach me every day and I am so grateful to serve a God who cares for me and my family. I realize that many people have worse situations, but I also realize that it's  ok to admit when things are a little difficult. No one is super mom. And I think, at least in the "mom blog" world, we put on a face of "everything is great." Some people struggle and maybe this little story will encourage someone along the way :)

You can't out plan God

This morning as I enjoy my cup of Joe and watch Carter run around, I can't help but think back to last night's lesson and our life exactly one year ago. So many things have happened in a year! 

Last year-

Exactly a year ago, I was worrying about Carter not walking, turning one (already?!?!) and being short. Ha! The things we worry about as moms! There were other concerns and new steps as a family that we had and were taking. Josh began a new job exactly a year ago yesterday. Uncertainty seems to make us uneasy, excited and thankful, but uneasy. I also began a new job. While I was excited, I was worried. Worried about Carter being in school for the first time. Worried about teaching and still keeping up with my "Momma" duties. Worried "Can I really be a teacher?"

 Yes, if you can't tell yet, I was/am a worrier. Stressed doesn't begin to touch it :) 

This year-

This year has presented it's own worries. A new baby?!? How in the world will I be able to _______?? I've filled in the blank a million times. New house? Yes or No? Now or Later? Wreaths are coming out of my ears and laundry is piling up. Dinner needs to be cooked and all I want to do is rest. 

While this year has its own worries and concerns, over the last year I have taken to heart some scripture and "advice" that my grandmother loves to give. Content. Be content. Use what you have. Don't be greedy. Worry? Why worry?? What good will it do you? I'm not saying that I don't worry from time to time, but I don't let it consume me like it use to. I was rather proud of myself a week or so ago in a conversation with Josh. He asked why I wasn't saying anything and I replied "well, I'm not worried. I'm content with where I am and I'm not worried." Props to my husband, he is NOT a worrier. So I think he was a little suprised. 

You can't out plan God. Not even me :) You can't put Him in a box and take Him out when you want Him. Who am I to worry? He takes care of so much, why not me too? So this year, I'm not worried about this baby, school, work etc. (or I'm trying) I worry/strive to do God's will. My ultimate goal should be being a better Christian. Not school, not a new house, not a job. I'm not saying that those things aren't important, but I truly believe that if I follow Him, and put Him first in my decisions, everything will turn out fine. If it doesn't? I'm still relying on Him to get me through because isn't He better off in control? 

Be blessed today and try not to worry :) it only takes time and adds wrinkles! 

A Proverbs 31 Woman

As some may know, today has been a busy day for the Swanger family. It has been a day of waiting and doctors and anticipation.

Some of you may know that my Mother-in-law, Linda Swanger, was diagnosed with Stage 1 breast cancer. She decided on a lumpectomy and underwent that surgery today. The surgery appears to have went very well and we are now waiting on pathology results. They did take lymph nodes for testing and those will also be on the pathology report. She is currently at home resting. At this stage, things appear to be as positive as they can be and now we are praying and waiting for good pathology reports.

I want to thank those who have sent her encouraging notes and calls and have kept her and the family in your prayers. I wanted to give a quick update on the surgery, but I also wanted to share with you some thoughts.

When I first met Linda, My exact words to my then boyfriend/now husband, was "Your mom hates me! She said nothing to me!!" He reassured me that that was only her quiet nature. As years passed, I learned very quickly that he was right. Once I became a part of her life, there weren't many "quiet" moments. Her laugh is loud, hilarious, and contagious! Her personality is sweet and caring, especially towards her family and those she loves. And above all else, her spirit is faithful and willing. Willing to take any challenge that comes her way, and believe me, she has had many. She always takes the bull by the horn and her heart is always striving to do what is right. I know that many of you have known her much longer than I have and you know this very person that I am telling you about. 

When I married Josh, I was going through many things within my own family. There were voids that I wanted so desperately to fill. Please don't get me wrong, I absolutely love my in-laws, but I will never have the relationship with Linda that she has with her children, Josh and Britney. There are things as their mother and as a family that they experienced that I can never understand. I can say, however, ever since Linda entered my life, she filled a void for me with a relationship that I had waited a very long time for. I would like to think that while I am not her birth child and may can not have the relationship with her that they have, we have our own special relationship that no one else can have. She teaches me so much about not only being a mother and friend, but about being a christian. Please believe me when I tell you that the faithful woman that you see at church is the same faithful Christian woman you will find throughout the week. Just ask those she's close to and works with. 

No one expects to get cancer. It will never happen to you or your family, right? Well, no. With every cancer diagnosis, I can understand depression, anxiety, fear, anger, etc. While I'm sure Linda has experienced these feelings, her main goal has remained to help any others that she can and to continue to pursue Christ. How amazing?! As I drove to the hospital this morning, I listened to a Christian radio station. (If you don't, I would highly recommend it) Song after song spoke of having no fear for we have already won the fight, or "I know who goes before me, I know who stands behind", or "We were meant to be courageous." It brought tears to my eyes. We know that no matter what happens in this life, we have won the fight. We will live eternally. What confidence! What a thought to remember during tough times.

I just wanted you all to know what an example my sweet Mother in law is and what a blessing she is. (Many of you already know that) Often times, I think of Proverbs 31 when I think of her. I can assure you that her family would have many nicer words and experiences to share, but I just wanted you to know my two cents worth :)

She did ask me to post a surgery update on her site, but I thought I would add a little something extra. Please continue to shower her with prayer and encouragement as I'm sure this journey will not be an easy one but it appears to be one that she is determined to make a positive experience in the end. Thank you all so very very much!

Packing for 3 1/2

Long time, no post! Whew! Having a toddler, a job and other responsibilities seem to take up my extra "blogging" time. For now, I'm back. Not only am I back for blogging, but I'm back with a little green olive sized sidekick! Yep.....for those who don't know yet....the Swanger family is growing. (More like mommy's poor tummy) But that's another blog for another day! 

What's on the agenda for today?

 V-A-C-A-T-I-O-N

Oh yes, the salty smell of the ocean, the rough sand between your toes, the seafood......yes! BUT In order to get to those things, I have to get my crazy, busy, nutso family in to gear! 

Wouldn't you figure that VBS would be the week before vacation, the vacation forecast would include rain, along with the husband jinxing the travel vehicle and now, 24 hours before we leave, said vehicle is in the shop! Needless to say, this momma is stressed! Nevertheless, we WILL go on vacation. :) So on to packing for a family of 3 1/2. 

I've heard from other packing/traveling mommies some tips of the trade. I've also heard some tips to keep my active, attitude prone toddler busy! Because our vehicle situation has changed, I've decided to make a list of packing must do's for our little family in order to save space. Maybe they'll help someone else and maybe some of you already do these! 

FIRST- Write it down.  Call it pregnancy brain if you want, but if it isn't listed, it isn't packed. And heaven forbid we get to Florida without that favorite shirt! 

SECOND- Lay it out. I try to put it all on the bed and make sure all of my days are accounted for. 

THIRD- Roll it.  Saves on space and saves on wrinkles if you'll roll it up and place it in your bag that way. 

FOURTH- Save space. By that I mean, if you can split the little wampus' stuff up and put it in yours and the hubs bag, do it! Fewer bags to carry later and your hubs may be thanking you. 

OTHERS- some other tips that I've figured out after a few trips......if there will be a washing machine, use it! It may not be appealing to do laundry while on vacation, but your back will thank you for it later when you have a million things to carry up 20 flights :) make a list of things to do before you leave. (Bills to pay, laundry to finish, trash to take out) It will calm the "did we forget something?" thoughts. Next, Do you REALLY need the stroller, pack n play, huge toy, play may, etc?? In our case? NO! Saving space right there. 

Another thing we are doing a LITTLE differently this year, and that's a budget.......well let me explain. Ever gotten home from vacation and said "wow, we spent more than I thought we would. " Yes you have. Don't try to pretend. Unless you have a money tree, you've noticed. Not a bad thing. We could care less what we spend on vacation and won't hold back on anything. This year, all of Mommy's extra cash from the semester is going toward vacation. So, I've made out a little list (yes another one). Nothing strict but just a list of what things we'll need or want to do and how much those will be. That way, I'll have an idea of the cost before we go. 

This will be Carter's first time at the beach as a mobile munchkin. I'm excited to see what he thinks and nervous that he'll be completely unlike his momma and daddy and hate it. A few tips that I've heard work, are a baby pool under the umbrella, sandcastle toys and balls, plenty of snacks, sunscreen, and baby powder (to wipe off all of that sand).

So I'm off to my crazy 24 hours before leaving but would love any toddler/beach tips not listed from other experienced mommies! Wish us luck! 

A passionate Christian-American

I'm not really sure how to start this post, how to word this post or if I should even write this post. I don't claim to be the most informed or the most "correct", and I'm sure to some, I may even come off a little opinionated at times. (Shocker, I know)

For starters, I did vote, and I lost. I was disappointed and I did pray for our country (as I have no matter who is in office) I will not pretend to agree with our current administration, nor with some of the moral values they represent. I will continue to stand up for my morals and beliefs. With that being said, I have prayed for BOTH Barack Obama and Mitt Romney for a long time. I respect the office of the President and will continue to. What bothers me with this election is how ruthless and degrading people can be. My issue really has nothing to do with who won the election (although I am admittedly not excited about it), but how Christians can be so worked up about an election and not even raise a finger to help or minister in their own community. Forget the "unwholesome talk" flying around. Why are we not near as passionate about being a Christian as we are about being an American? I don't know about you, but I'm a Christian first and an American second. If you don't like our president, fine. If you are a christian, Does that change the fact that you are called to act as Jesus would and strive to bring others to Christ? If you do like our president, fine. Does that change the fact that you are called to act as Jesus would and strive to bring others to Christ?

Why are we not as passionate about evangelizing, reading the Bible, encouraging, praying....etc? Its funny to me that people are quick to give an opinion, prove someone wrong or promote a political agenda, but many of those same people are the last to sign up for the church ______(fill in the blank) if even at all, visit the poor widow, or even attend bible class. No matter who the president is, we still have the power to evangelize, minister, pray etc. Of course it isn't "easy" to be a Christian in todays time, but He never said that it would be. The president (whoever it may be or is) can not take my Christianity or my God away from me. Therefore, I am called to live according to His purpose. And haven't we already "won?"

Bottom line, America is full of what I call "back burner" Christians. And until we start putting Christ first and showing His love, things won't change. Not just politically but spiritually. Calling people "ignorant" or "idiots" and telling people to "suck it up" or "tuck your tail between your legs" is not the attitude we are called to have.

What may be more disappointing than any political race are the amount of lack luster Christians today.